Polite Programming
Who says that you can’t be polite and proper even if you are a programmer?
#define please
int a = 5; please
int myFunction(){ return 5 please; }
if(error) abort please ();
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I know a programmer who did something like that when he first learned C. He was fond of the Pascal/Ada style, so he did this:
#define then
#define begin {
#define end }
Then he could write code in the style to which he was accustomed:
if (a == b) then begin
return true;
end;
INTERCAL, the original parody programming language, had an undocumented feature that a certain fraction of the statements had to contain the word “PLEASE” (something like between a fifth and a third of the statements). If the word didn’t appear frequently enough, the compiler rejected the program as insufficiently polite — and likewise if it appeared too frequently, which was considered to be grovelling.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/INTERCAL
http://www.muppetlabs.com/~breadbox/intercal-man/
Heh, yeah. That’s actually the discussion Scott and I had that brought up the idea of “please”.